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What's in a story? What even is my story?

The question, "what kind of story are we in?" has me in some sort of existential crisis. It is a simple question, really. It's a question I've been asked in grief therapy, at church (though it was what's your testimony?), and it's a question I have asked myself after reading a good book. I feel as though my answer changes for whoever is asking. For my grief counselor, my stories in therapy sessions always included my great-grandmother. Most of the time, she was the protagonist and I was a secondary character. Her passing was the reason I was there. I suppose I was in a different story in that time of my life than I am now, and even now, doesn't it change based on who I'm interacting with? If I think of my life as a giant narrative, I imagine it as a series. A broken, but generally pretty happy childhood, an angsty teenage phase, undergraduate days where I was figuring out who I am, who I want to be and where I want to go, and now, graduate school and adulthood.

I think everyone has their own individual narrative, their own story to tell. The hard part is probably figuring out who you are in someone else's story. I know when I graduated high school and educated myself, I apologized to people that were good friends to me. Not that I was a mean girl, or a bully, but rather because I did and said things that would be considered micro-aggressions or homophobic. I think an important part of your story is the character development. Without it, the narrative stays stagnant.

I guess to answer the question (I feel like I've been dancing around it a little bit and now I'm just rambling), the kind of story we are in is one that is always evolving, always changing, always rotating. My story is not the same as anyone else's, and that's a good thing. The stories we participate in and create will probably be told one day. Maybe not in depth or written down, but through photographs, social media posts, spoken about in passing. I suppose I will end this blog with this quote from my favorite story of all time The Perks of Being a Wallflower: 

"“And all the books you've read have been read by other people. And all the songs you've loved have been heard by other people. And that girl that's pretty to you is pretty to other people. and that if you looked at these facts when you were happy, you would feel great because you are describing 'unity.'” (Chbosky). 

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